Streams in the Desert - July 31

A friend gave me the devotional Streams in the Desert right before we left for Russia last month. I've really enjoyed it and it speaks to my heart everyday... um, that is, everyday I make time to read it.

Today's entry especially caught my attention. We have friends that are in Russia right now, meeting their new son. Wow, that brings back memories. They've waited a long time, like we did. They've faced many challenges regarding their agency and the adoption process, like we did.

In the wait, when there was no news, no sign, no encouragment, it made us wonder if we were doing the right thing. Is there some other path we should have taken? Did we miss an exit somewhere? (Probably, because I was distracted by trying to figure out my bluetooth... hate that thing.)

Scott and I spent the better part of 3 years in a place marked with uncertainty, but we chose to stay the course. The last clear word we had heard from the Lord said to stay the course. Often, there were no signs, no maps, no gut instincts... only faith in the unseen.

So, if you're waiting for something today, maybe you'll be encouraged by these words:

Streams in the Desert, July 31
"With skillful hands he led them." Psalm 78:72

When you are unsure which course to take, totally submit your own judgement to that of the Spirit of God, asking Him to shut every door except the right one. But meanwhile keep moving ahead and consider the absence of a direct indication from God to be evidence of His will that you are on His path. And as you continue down the long road, you will find that He has gone before you, locking doors you otherwise would have been inclined to enter. Yet you can be sure that somewhere beyond the locked doors is one He has left unlocked. And when you open it and walk through, you will find yourself face to face with a turn in the river of opportunity- one that is broader and deeper than anything you ever dared to imagine, even in your wildest dreams...

I must admit that I did not always carry myself with grace as we were on the journey. As I think about it now, I realize that the Lord often carried me with His grace. But, here we are today, in the midst of something greater than we could have imagined. Greater doesn't always mean happiest or most exciting, but it certainly means something amazing. Our journey continues. Our need for grace continues. Our need to trust that God will lock and unlock doors continues.

If you are reading this today,
God Bless You

Haircuts

Scott and Justin got haircuts today! Justin did great. Grinned the entire time! On the drive home, Scott told Justin he looked handsome and Justin responed by telling his Papa that he was also handsome. They really are a nice looking pair!


Before dinner Scott read a book to the kids. Notice the "crown" Justin donned on him. I was also given one. We were told that we were a prince and princess. Who knew?!


A fun game of Lucky Ducky. Molly stays close by.



Speaking of Molly... She is well loved.

It's a Zoo Around Here

Since we sort of live in one... we decided we'd make a trip to the ZOO!

It was a little too hot and Natalie and Justin spent much of the day arguing about who was going to ride in the stroller, but other than that we had a good time! Around the dinner table tonight we found out that Justin's favorite animal was the lion. Natalie said her favorite was the giraffe. Lexi didn't really tell us, but judging from today's experience, I'd say her favorite part of the zoo was standing under the water mister.

We were all exhausted by the end of the day. Walking around with the 3 kids and a stroller reminded me of our time in Russia. It already seems like ages ago, but we've only been home 26 days. (We were in Russia for 28 days!) All in all, we continue to do well. The kids are happy. It's hard to believe that only a few weeks ago, they spent their days in the confines of an orphanage. What an amazing plan God had for them, for us.

I do often find myself short on patience and just wishing everyone would BE QUIET for a minute. The noise is one thing I wasn't prepared for. They are so noisy! But I'm developing a filter for what's important. I also wish I had more one on one time with each of them. As far as that goes, I wish I had more one on one time with my bed and pillow! I'm not sure I'm ever going to get used to the early morning wake up call. It usually comes from Justin. A gentle poke in the back and a whisper,"Mama? Mama?" Unfortunately, he didn't come with a snooze button.

Bolshoy

Bolshoy means big.
Justin often sticks out his belly, pats it, and says bolshoy.

The other day Justin, Natalie, and I were standing in the bathroom.
Justin patted his belly and said, "Bolshoy!"
Natalie patted her belly and said, "Bolshoy!"
So I patted my belly and said, "Bolshoy!"
Natalie chimes in, "Nyet mama!" (Aww, thanks! She says I don't have a big belly!)

Then she patted me right on the butt and said, "BOLSHOY!"
Gee... thanks.

Happy Birthday Scott!

Yep, that's right. We've now celebrated 3 birthdays in 5 days! Since I'd made Natalie and Justin silly little birthday hats for their big days, I figured Scott needed one too, with a little Cubs touch, of course.


After some blueberry pancakes and a visit from some future babysitters (3 of Scott's students. Hi girls!), we headed to a local park to meet some friends. This park has an area with fountains and lots of water to splash in. What fun! Lexi outlasted everyone. All of the other kids came back for some lunch, while Lexi tottered around in the water. Every few minutes she came back to Scott for a smile or for help putting her pinky toe back in her shoe! "Uh oh!" She'd say and point to her little toe poking out of a hole in her crocs.

Natalie spent only a few minutes in the water, then headed back to her cozy towel to watch the action from afar. She likes to be outside and she likes the water, but she doesn't like the chance of being splashed or knocked down. Keep things predictable or she'd rather be inside with a book or doll!



It's been wonderful for Justin to get the chance to interact with other boys and girls his own age. Thank you SO MUCH to our friends who have prepped your kids before hanging out with us. Really, your children have been so kind and patient with Justin and the girls. They're setting such a great example. We know our kids are still learning to share, take turns, and play WITH others. We just can't thank you enough for helping us and loving us through the time we are spending with you and your kids. I hope you'll remain patient with us as we transition the kids and transition ourselves into being a family.

To wrap up Scott's birthday, Baba and Grandpa came by to watch the kids for a couple of hours. We got to go to a grown up dinner, which apparently means one is able to sit in the same chair for an hour without getting up to refill milk or replace a dropped fork or wipe off sticky fingers. It was nice.

And now here we sit in the quiet of our living room. Scott's watching the Cubs play, as he just said, "The worst game in the entire world." I guess that means they're losing (insert your own Cubs joke here).

Sorry about the Cubs, but happy birthday anwyay, Papa.

Guess How Much I Love You

You're probably familar with the book Guess How Much I Love You. Even before we had kids I'd heard this sweet little story of Little Nutbrown Hare who tries so hard to express how much he loves his mama (or maybe it's a papa?) Anyway, Big Nutbrown Hare always assures Little that he is loved beyond anything he could imagine, even "to the moon and back."

A few nights ago, I tucked Natalie in, gave her goodnight kisses, and whispered,
I love you
She looked at me, stretched out her arms and said,
This much

I'm so grateful that this little girl, my daughter, finally knows love.

This morning, as my house is still quiet, and the children are just beginning to stir I'm thinking about how much I'm loved. Loved by a Savior, who accepted the cross, who stretched out his arms for me, and said,
I love you... This much

Happy 5th BirFday Justin!

BirFday
That's how the kids say birthday. Well, that's how Justin and Natalie say it, Lexi just yabbers a few syllables and smiles! (See video below!) After some birthday pancakes we headed over to Baba and Grandpa's house for a little pool party and lunch. To Scott's absolute delight, one of Justin's gifts from the grandparents was a Cubs hat, complete with a new glove, bat, ball and tee. The kids had a blast and Justin keeps telling us how he hit a ball over the fence... at least that's what I think he's saying! Cousin Melanie blessed us with a super delicious birthday dinner. (Thanks Mel! It was yummy!) Bath, Books, Bed, and another day down. Another day of this new life.
This new life.
It's different.
It's hard.
But it's full of grace.
It's a blessed life.



Hey?! Did he say something about Big Bird's testicle????

May I Recommend a Big Blue Pool?

Our kids really like the water... and Lexi, LOVES the water. So when they woke up from naps today to find a big blue pool in the backyard, well, EXCITED, barely begins to describe their reaction. Here's a few pix and a video. Don't worry about Lexi... she had the best time!

Happy Birthday Natalie!

Natalie turned 4 years old today. Ah, don't they grow up so fast?! :) Seems like only a few weeks ago I was holding her for the first time, hearing her first words, having her first bath time.... Oh wait... that was only a few weeks ago!

Last night we decorated her chair with balloons and ribbon. We put a special plate, party hat, and a small gift at her place at the table. She came downstairs this morning well aware that today was her din-raj-dinya. Baba and Grandpa came over for dinner and cake and ice cream. Natalie was absolutely thrilled with the little stroller they gave her. At this point, pretty much all of the toys we have at the house are nasha egrushka or OUR toys. We were very anxious to see how the kids would handle a MY toy. As grandpa was assembling the stroller, Natalie continually reminded all of us that this was HER gift. In the end, it all turned out fine. Natalie played for a while, then gave Justin a turn with the stroller, and Justin gave Lexi a turn. No tears, no arguments... what happened to my children? Perhaps they remembered the treehouse I had recently taken from them because they were fighting over it... and the doll... and the blocks....

Here's a few pix from Natalie's special day. Stay tuned... Justin turns 5 on Saturday!!!

Doctor Visit

It only took 5 and a half hours, but we completed our first visit to a doctor!
Today we met with an international adoption specialist. The main purpose was to establish a baseline for where the kids are regarding some important developmental, social, physical, and attachment related milestones. We had a bit of a drive to get to the office, but it was well worth it. The doctor was terrific and the kids were great. We've met a Russian college student who is living with one of the families from our church. Natasha came over earlier in the day to meet the kids, then joined us on our trip to the doctor. She was able to translate a few times and was so helpful keeping the kids occupied while we talked with the doctor.

Overall, we got great feedback regarding all of the kids. The doctor had no major concerns. His advice was just to keep doing what we're doing, stay vigilant with being on the lookout for possible problems, and come back in a few months to do it all over again. Sometimes issues won't present themselves for months or years after kids leave an orphanage. We have a long list of labwork to get done with our local pediatrician... um, not so much looking forward to all of the needles.

And now, for one final "Awwww Moment": Tonight at bedtime, Natalie pulled our faces toward her, and gave both Scott and I a goodnight kiss. They get lots of kisses from us and will sometimes reciprocate if we ask them to, but tonight Natalie initiated her own special goodnight kisses for the both of us. Awwww! :)

The key to me not losing my mind: OUTINGS!!!
I know there is a need to keep our kids' world small for a while, but after a few days at home, and only at home, I was having a hard time. Since the successful Chick-fil-a outing, we've had a couple of backyard pool playdates with friends, a morning at a park, and one exciting trip to Sam's Club!

Everyone is basically doing great. We're especially keeping our eye on Lexi, who is maybe a little too comfortable with strangers. She's such a ham. She definitely provides the entertainment in the family. Just a note, for now it's still important that Scott and I be the main people that are holding the kids and snuggling them and are showing affection. While they really are doing an incredible job with attachment, we must remember that they've only been with us for 3 weeks. We have a doctor's appointment set for next week with an IA specialist (int'l adoption). He'll be able to give us more of an idea of what to look for and how to handle some adoption specific issues we might be facing.

Here are a few pictures from our trip to the park. And one of Molly... poor Molly, her favorite place to lay is right in front of the couch... it's getting a little more crowded there.

One Week

We've been home 1 week. We've survived 1 week!

Routines and rituals are starting to form. Expectations are being set forth. It seems the kids all take turns testing us to see if we are really going to follow through. Good thing they don't get organized and all gang up on us at once! Scott and I would really be in trouble then! We'd have our own little Russian Revolution :)

We went to Chick Fil A for dinner last night. Tuesday. Kids eat free! Scott's parents met us there. By the way, you may now address Norma as Baba (short for Babushka) and George is Grandpa. Dinner went great. The kids did a little craft. Then it was off to the play area. They loved it! At the craft table, Justin and another little girl about his age were working side by side and just talking away to each other. They didn't seem to notice... or care... that they spoke different languages.

Here's a few pictures from our trip to the pool. As we suspected, Lexi loves the water. They all enjoyed themselves though. And the best part... they were zonked out for long naps afterward!

... And Molly Makes Six!

Molly's home! Thank you so much to the Colfers who took such good care of her. Justin warmed up to her right away. The girls have been a little more hesitant, but it won't be long until Molly's "just another piece of furniture" to them. (To quote my pal Mindy the Wise) They've all been throwing the ball for her. Justin and Natalie helped feed her dinner. And as for Molly, she's been perfect with the kids. Calm, quiet... so unMollylike!

We seem to be working into a routine. The days are still long and exhausting, but we're hanging in there. We've really appreciated the visits and dinners we've been receiving. Thanks to Rebecca for organizing meals!

Justin's tantrums are definitely subsiding. Language is still difficult. I can't wait for the day I can actually talk to the kids. They have so much to say and are constantly chattering away. They're picking up more and more English everyday, but it's all so primitive. We've been loaned some sign language videos which we're going to be watching and I've TiVoed a few episodes of Sesame Street (I still love that show!)

We're taking it all day by day. Well, really more like, hour by hour. And I hope to spend the next 7 hours sleeping!

3 Days Home

We had a nice, quiet, low key 4th of July. We took the new wagon for a spin. Everyone squished in without a single argument (that's BIG progress!) Lexi loves loves loves being outside. She asks to go out every 20 minutes or so! She also loves to be wet. We played with the water table today and in no time she was spilling cups of water all over her head. Bathtime is definitely her favorite time of day. While the other two are fighting over toys and tub space, Lexi is as content as can be pouring water all over herself. We haven't taken her to the pool yet, but I have a feeling she'll dive right in... she's pretty fearless. This also accounts for the many bumps and bruises she is currently sporting! Check out her right cheek for evidence of the Moscow swingset incident.

As I type, Molly is on her way home. The Colfers were so generous to keep her while we were away. The kids are expecting her. We've been talking about it for two days and they say they want to see her. "Mwolly" they call her. Adding a dog to the mix? We must be crazy. :)





Might Lexi be a future Cubs fan? Daddy hopes so!

Independence Day

Independence? Hmm, that's a little ironic, since I seem to have lost mine somewhere between here and Siberia! :)

So we're home. Wow, home feels good. I can't help but hope that someday, when our children are older, they'll be able to come HOME and know the relief and comfort it brings. Finally, they have a HOME.

So you're probably wondering how the flight was, right? Compared to our first one, this was 100% better. They were all squirmy for the first few hours, but repeated trips to the restroom kept us moving (so gross). The girls slept for a good 5 hours toward the end, while Justin, who was completely exhausted, somehow managed to keep himself awake... the entire time! I guess 2 out of 3 isn't bad. We hung in there though. A 2 hour wait through immigration was torture, but when we finally rounded the corner with our bags, 3 staggering children in tow, and I saw Scott's parents waiting there, I was overcome with... I don't know, with something! Relief I guess. It was so good to see familar, loving faces.

And now our quest to creating normalcy, a routine, a safe haven. I'm told there are so many people out there who are checking the blog and praying for us. Are you still going to be as interested in my posts about doing laundry and cleaning toilets??? :)

And now a quick confession. Things have been hard. Mostly with trying to handle Justin, but also just keeping an eye on all of them, loving them enough, giving them enough attention... sometimes when we don't feel like it. There have been moments when I've felt like this was the longest babysitting job of my life. When the kids are finally sleeping and I probably should be standing over them, grateful, in awe of the beautiful blessing, I don't want to. Scott and I have both looked at each other, exasperated, and thought, where is the joy? I look forward to getting some joy back. So while we know that this new life of ours is the fulfillment of God's promise... we know that it is an amazing honor to be part of living in his plan... we know that things will be easier, happier, more joyful soon... we haven't done a great job of acknowledging that God continues to be the author of this journey... and we definitely haven't been saying thank you, even in the midst of struggle.

I read this in a devotional this morning and I found it pretty convicting... and just what I needed:

O you of little faith,
God has not failed you yet!
When all looks dark and gloomy,
You do so soon forget-

Forget that He has led you,
And gently cleared your way;
On clouds has poured His sunshine,
And turned your night to day.

And if He's helped you to this point,
He will not fail you now;
How it must wound His loving heart
To see your anxious brow!

Oh! doubt not any longer,
To Him commit your way,
Whom in the past you trusted,
And is just the same today.

I hope to get some pictures up soon. Please don't be afraid to call and check in on us. It wouldn't be a bother. Thanks for loving us.

Home

We are home. Yay.

Tell you more about it when I wake up.